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Monday, November 30, 2009

Story of Every Semester

Every New Semester After One Week
After The First Internals

Before The Second Internals
After The Second Internals During The Third Internals
During Lab Tests, Grand Viva, etc… Once Semester Dates are Out…
7 Days Before the Exams... 6 Days Before the Exams...
5 Days Before the Exams... 4 Days Before the Exams...
3 Days Before the Exams... 2 Days Before the Exams...
1 Day Before the Exams... The Final Night Before the Exams...
One Hour Before the Final Exam... One Hour Before the Final Exam...
Outside the Exam Hall after the Exams are Over... Once all the Exams are Over... Now That’s Life at CVRCE !

Blazers’ Day Out !

Computer Science Department has been historically one of the most insane and weird branches of CVRCE since years. Their horrible, weird and illogical antics in the college premises have been unparalleled with the exception of the IT students who definitely are the pioneers in this field. A few weeks back a similar strange and incomprehensible incident was seen in the college campus. The guys, semi-guys and girls from CS were all dressed in oversized blazers and posing like total jackasses for photographs all over the place.

I and Hatasia Harry decided to investigate the matter. We were told that the nerds were posing form some photo that will be published in some nerd-magazine. Whatever. But it is beyond logic that how come the CS guys who are BPUT-Famous for their insane amount of mass bunks turn up in such huge numbers for some loser photo shoot?! Anyway, we report some highlights from this weird event.

 

  • CS2 Sherni and Hawt Bihari Kudi (HBK) posed in some absolute loser style photographs in which they hopelessly tried to act like lecturers teaching stuff. They tried to act funny but ended up looking like some geeks whose photos come out in the brochure/prospectus of loser engineering college.
  • Bholadri Dutta woke up at 4 am, gets shaved, shaves chest, legs, arms,etc. Sprays five different deodorants, colognes, perfumes, etc. Applies makeup, hair gel, face wash, fairness cream and other gay stuff. Puts on a costly Reid & Taylor Blazer, Holyfield black shoes, Raymond’s Tie, Allen Solly Suit, Park Avenue Shirt, Jockey Inners, etc . Arrives at college well before anybody else. Sadly all this preparation for the photo soot goes down the drain because of the unforgiving sun. All the beauty queen stuff he had put on wears off due to the heat and sweat and finally Bholadri Dutta still looks like a geek in the Photos.
  • Paradeep Kotipathy forgets his blazer at home. He was the only guy in the photo shoot without a blazer. No big surprise that he looks like a homeless villager or a college sweeper among the other geeks in the final photos.
  • Bhootiya Kutta’s and Foreign Kumar Hembram’s blazers gets exchanged accidentally. Bhootiya Kutta looks like he is wearing a oversized black kurta in the final photos. Foreign Kumar Hembram looks like he is wearing sexy top .
  • Peacock-Race Sahoo turns up in the college after two years of disappearance for the photo shoot. The CS HOD Dr. Kamilla plans to do more such photo shoots to rev up the declining attendance among the students.
  • CS Lecturer Mr. Mohit Panda who resembles a Kollywood Side-Hero seemed more excited than the students about the photo shoot. He changed his shirt four times throughout the day for the photo shoot.
  • Hottie Verma’s ex-boyfriend from ‘Safed Vardi-Wala Branch ’ turns up at the photo shoot in full ‘Tere Naam’ style. Famous Housebreaker Shoe-Case Dash plays superhero and goes to save the day.
  • China Bomb comes to college for the photo shoot inspite of a broken ankle. Frustu-a-sis Panigrahi gets a nervous breakdown after seeing her.
  • Shit-ish Pradhan and Supermodel Mahapatra pose for a pseudo-romantic photograph. Reports state that Supermodel Mahapatra fled the scene soon as she was unable to endure the rotten Shit-isms by Shit-ish Pradhan. By the way we miss the famous crumpled dress Miss Supermodel Mahapatra !

Thus went a strange day at Loserville…oops CS Block. If this day wasn’t ‘loser’ enough, all the other branches decided to ape the weird photo-shoot activity in the coming days. Epic Losers. Keep Visiting CVRCE Diary. Meanwhile lemme dry wash my blazer. My branch has its photo-shoot tomorrow!

Signing Off

Dahara Dick & Hatasia Harry

( Senior Khabris )

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Welcome Our Newest Member !

1AB_detective-3-thumb160799Hello readers ! This post is dedicated to the so called success story of our newest recruit in CVRCE Diary, Mr Ladkibaaz Larry ! He has been appointed as the Guptchar-in-Chief for the blog and hence would indulge in spy activities around the college on behalf of CVRCE Diary. Ladkibaaz Larry would also take an additional post as an Associate Khabri and would occasionally write small articles on his day to day observations of the college activities . Larry had a very colorful life and has seen many ups and downs. Currently he is heading the list of ‘The Guys With Most Number Of Rejected Proposals’ list in CVRCE. Hatasia Harry and Dahara Dick took a small interview of this illustrious gentleman just after his induction into the CVRCE Diary Team. Read on…

 

 

  • Hatasia Harry : Hi Ladkibaaz Larry ! Welcome abroad to the CVRCE Diary Team !
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : Thank You !

 

  • Hatasia Harry : Would you please tell our readers a little more about you ?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : Hi ! This is Ladkibaaz Larry. I‘m not a flirt; actually I’m just a 'Naari ki pujaaari' ! The best thing about being a Ladkibaaz is that you can be single anytime 4 anyone. I was an ordinary guy in school with extra-ordinary marks. Actually in school, guys with higher percentage had higher chances of bagging a chick. So tried my best and studied hard without watching FTV or MGM till 12th and secured around 90% in both 10th and 12th. And I managed to bag a stunning girl in the end of the day! Then achanak one day that girl deserted me and my life went upside down for all the wrong reasons. My studies were gone, I surfed all sites like ‘Red World’ and ‘Deb Nayar’ all day long. And my dreams of getting into an IIT were spoiled and I ended up here in CVRCE.

 

  • Hatasia Harry : Sorry to hear about that Mr. Larry. *Fake Concern*
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : Thank you for empathizing with my condition. *Cries*

  • Dahara Dick : Would you like to share your views on CVRCE Diary?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : CVRCE is one of the most happening colleges of Asia coz IIT's have become boring after Chetan Bhagat passed out. And making such a spicy blog with so much detective stuff added is a dicey job. But I’m sure that people are going to love it. This could be the biggest ever thing happened to CVRCE 06-10 batch.

 

  • Hatasia Harry : How does it feel to be appointed as the prestigious position of Guptachar-in-Chief of CVRCE Diary?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : Bitching is an art and bitching publicly on a blog is not a easy task. I always want to keep my stomach clean. So I can’t hide things. Then I decided to write them on a blog and being a part of CVRCE DIARY I feel like kissing Angie. It’s a great honor that I’m a part of it. That too being the Guptchar-in-chief I’m just overwhelmed. This is a real Kick ass job ! *Kicks the arse of Hatasia Harry*

  • Hatasia Harry :Taking into account that your work at CVRCE Diary requires high levels of secrecy how do you manage to switch between your professional and personal life ?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : Everyone must be aware of Gangadhar and Shaktimaan .My life is just like Gangadhar's and Larry is the Shaktimaan. I’m watching a few Shaktimaan videos and trying to learn as much as I can. I’m using the option 'Invisible' often on Gtalk nowadays. I am watching INDIA TV more (secretly) to get some inspiration on how to make a big deal out of nothing.

 

  • Dahara Dick : Do you wear capes and tights while doing your Guptachar activities?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : If the script demands, then yes. But I’m not comfortable in tights coz, if you sweat in odd places then you can lose focus from your job. *Hatasia Harry and Dahara Dick give a disgusted look*

  • Dahara Dick : Have you sacrificed your time spent in surfing ‘EDUCATIONAL SITES’ for dedication to CVRCE Diary?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry: Naah… In fact I have increased that time. Because when you do such a challenging job then you have to de-stress yourself and what better way to do it than surfing porn ! I think it’s a good habit for Guptachar coz you never know whose clips you are going to watch today n u may get news from there also !  *Hatasia Harry and Dahara Dick give more disgusted looks*

  • Hatasia Harry : Tell us about your previous experiences being a Guptachar ?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : You know, I have been offered a job by Bill Gates to spy on Larry Page but Billy threw me out coz I was flirting with her daughter. Fcuk you Billy. I curse Windows 7 will sell in pan shops behind CVRCE for 10 bucks. And then the Ambani brothers also appointed me to spy on each other and spied on them both at a time and took salary from both of them.

 

  • Dahara Dick : What inspired you to become a Guptchar at CVRCE Diary ?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : It’s in my instinct. Still I would mention a real incident which changed my life. In 5th semester I often use the staff bathroom coz it has a mirror. One day it was locked from the inside. I heard some sounds of passion from inside. Then I waited for around 30 minutes. First came out Mr. Rohit Panda. I was shocked and I thought he must be plugging our own Angie but what I saw the next changed my life forever. The next person to come out was the Sucker Bona-Soyi ! Then I started following them and I found that they often exchange shirts and they take the leave on same day. From that day onwards I became a Guptachar.

 

  • Dahara Dick : Do you aspire to be a Senior Khabri one day ?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry : Karm karo, phal ki ashaa mat rakho. Kaam hi jeevan hai. I heard a GD about "Honesty is the best policy" and from then on I just want to be honest and do my job. As far as being Senior Khabri, it’s a just step away. I can give a ladki to any one of them n they will promote me on that moment.

 

  • Dahara Dick : A few words about the three Senior Khabris (Tom,Dick and Harry) ?
  • Ladkibaaz Larry: I won’t say anything until they pay me for it. Saale tino k tino bhikaari hai. Din me Ram Mandir ke aage baith te hai aur raat ko usi pise se net karte hai. Tom ne mujhe bola tha ke ek post ka 100 rupees dega, Par wo salaa ek khali gutkha de kar chala gaya. Dick to usse bhi gaya bada chutiya hai kahan ki har post ke baad ek ek nayi nayi ladki ka number dega. Par jo bhi number diya sab ke sab vodafone k customer care k number nikley! Aur bacha haraam khor Hatasia Harry. Saale ka CGPA se jyaada toh mere paas Fake Orkut profile hai….. Hey…hold on….Aaarggh….. *Tom Dick and Harry rain blows on Ladkibaaz Larry*

Um… Err… At the time of uploading this post, Ladkibaaz Larry is lying in the ICU of Kalinga Hospital after the heavy thrashings from the Senior Khabris Tom, Dick and Harry for bad mouthing them. He is expected to be back in the job very soon though. Keep visiting CVRCE Diary or else there’s a good chance that you might have to share a room with Larry at the Hospital too !

Pehchan Kaun? (The Fight for IT’s Identity)

Hatasia Harry spoke about Electronics and Telecom Branch. I Touter Tom am going to elaborate on a branch that is revered by one and all as their arch enemies. Any guesses? Yeah you all are right, Branch IT !  [:P]. Short and sweet, ‘IT’ unlike ’ETC’ which is a jargon to many! [;)]…I will explain the evolution of the IT guys of our batch through the three and a half years. In the first year when all branches were jumbled together, no one knew about the existence of a branch named IT (Maybe, even IT guys themselves…Lolz). Nothing changed in the 2nd year as well. They always stayed in the shadow of CSE branch. So, their immediate seniors thought off revolutionizing. Then began …
“RENAISSANCE OF BRANCH IT”!
It started with their own society getting formed (Grapevine has it that all this was done under pretensions of looting money!). Finally IT gained freedom. This first phase of their independence movement was undertaken by their seniors under the able leadership of “MR.ICICI Prudential”. All this went in vain coz he didn’t find an able successor. I mean Mr. Moon Moon could match him in terms of backlogs only (In fact OUTRUN him!) Come on Guys , who is interested in poems stolen from Nursery Rhymes books, stories uprooted (or inspired, as they call it) from CHAMPAK and Panchatantra kinda books!  One message for them. Get it clear …
GROW UP GUYS”!
All the days of Agyaat vaas came to an end. That was the day IT made it to the headlines for the first time…This day marked the advent of an unparalleled rivalry in the history of CVRCE. Even bigger than that of VINCE MCMAHON and STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN. I am refraining from discussing this further otherwise ”Mr.Bewda Kumar” and ”Unsatisfied Mishra” would hurl expletives at me. Who knows, ”Lambu Sas-Watt” and “Qurbaani Lenka” unite under the label of “BROTHERS IN ARMS” and threaten to boycott the blog too.(Just like they did in the mush talked about freshers’ party). But again, their limelight was stolen by kirdaars like “Disco Kid”,”Cute Bong ”,”Sandalwood Praharaj” and The Safed Wardi Wale Gunde ! One thing that amazes me is that, where was their all time leader, Mr. Moon Moon at the time of crisis. Oh sorry I forgot, he was busy glorifying all the laurels they have got! Friends, we all know how truthful and honest he is. It would take only a fool to believe him! The only thing that changed after that day was, they lost their only source of O grades i.e. in sessional marks! I mean what else you can expect after you pound “Mr. Chamchu” who is allegedly having an affair with “Miss Sharmili Poooooooooh……..ar”?! Friends, one thing to be noted is that all epic fights were fought by some way or the other due to a Girl. here too this “Lanka Dahan ” was due to “Miss Small-Song Singh”. Another advice for you IT guys…
“GET HER A BRANCH CHANGE”!
She would easily get herself accommodated in some or the other branch. I mean, I wouldn’t mind to get her seated beside me. Only problem would be CONCENTRATION! Nowadays, they have all turned photographers in unison. A means to get themselves self employed. Finally IT guys get placed in places other than Insurance Companies! All of them are seen clicking snaps at infinitesimally small frame rates and uploading them on Orkut. Leaders in this field are “Crime master GOGOI” from China Border and “Loser Saha” who has more photos in his album than scraps! I Repeat, Get it clear …
 ”GROW UP GUYS”!spoof

One thing that we need to attribute to these guys for is the wonderful spoof they got us during one of their numerous photo shoots. A real life example of “MERE BAAP PEHLE AAP”!  Another noteworthy thing about them is that how crazy they are to pose before the camera. Look closely at the following snap . Here poor ”Abhi Rajsena”  was asked to vacate his seat as “Kudi Punjaban” wanted to sit aside “Madan Lal”.  Must say “LUCKY GUY”! The most confused of the lot was “Crime master Gogoi from China Border”, (“paas baithu yaa dur baithu?”) One person who was sure in this field was “Mr. Graphical Manas”,  sitting a mile away from “Miss Book-House Patnaik”. One more message for the IT Guys…



“AIDS CHOONE SE NAHI FAILTA”!




Miss Small-Song Singh plays god in this branch, coz she is omniscient here and there in every other snap. I heard that before the camera is out she is ready with one of her unique poses. “Miss Wannabe-Hawtie Mishra” trying the “SANGAT KA ASAR ” funda staying close to “Ms Small-Song Singh”. Another advice for Mr. Batish Pattnaik. Stay away from close ups. It exposes your true colors (that of a semi guy!). Once again I would like to reiterate…..
”GROW UP GUYS”!
 

bn
Signing Off,

Touter Tom


(Senior Khabri)

Thursday, November 26, 2009

I, Robot ?

Electronics and Telecommunication Branch. God I honestly feel tired writing the name of the branch. Sometimes I wonder what short name I will give to the branch, is it ETC or is it EnTC? Even electronics guys are confused about the name of their branch [:P]. Anyways these guys have saved the arse of our college during counseling. Other bhakuas trail their choice of the college. I honestly never saw any electronic jackass backside of our college. ( Well about backside of our college, I will describe later. It’s my favorite hangout! )  [:p]
Well I got an impression on The Electronics guys when I entered college. Big specs. Popat looks. Oil damped hair. Roaming around the campus with books. Roaming outside the campus with books. Sitting in the bus with books. Shitting at home with books. Even smoking with books ! Oops that’s stretched, I thought electronics guys never smoke [:P]. But these guys have got one thing in them. A spirit driving them to do crazy stuff. A spirit of being different. Many tried, most doomed with their thoughts. But few gentlemen rose and took steps to be different. Like you see in movies 7-8 people rising from horizon like some superheroes with tights and capes with a mission [:P]. Well back to topic three guys from EnTC rose and took a step. And alas what was that? ROBOTICS. Huh? Goddamnit ! I always wonder, were they trying to be different ? Hawwww, Come on… It’s 5th semester and you are opening robotics club now ? [:O] *Applause* [:P]. I found students saying “Hey do u know there is a robotics club in the college?”. And the other one always replied “No”. Even now I hear the same answer from students! [:P]
Anyways one day a jackass Gajendra Barada brought 4-5 ICs and showed it to two more jackasses Robbie Panda and Hathi Singh. 3 pairs of eyes shined [;)]. And brainstorming started. Ideas fought with each other and they decided to do something different. They got a cheap name very easily “ROBOTIX[:D]. Cliché. Huh? To know more they looted college funds, went to some tech fests, stood there like jerks, smiled at each other, returned back to home, talked among each other and ended up with nothing [:P]. In the next phase the same loop began. This time they went to The IIT Tech-Fest, watched robotics events like villagers watching The Titanic [:D]. Again smiled at each other, returned back and talked about this to their senior master and still ended up with nothing. Coz even he could contribute nothing [:P].
This time it was height of patience. One day the 1st jackass brought one motor, connected it with some wires, ran it and said, ”See this is what called ROBOTICS”. 3 pairs of eyes shined, smiled at each other and said, “Even we can do this…it’s so simple[;)]. So after that these 3 jackasses searched the internet for porn, Tech-Fests happening here and there. They got one Tech-Fest which fascinated their geeky balls, took a bagful of bulbs and motors with them and reached there. And found that the event is a racing event. And what they got? A pair of motors, some wires, some bulbs, some ICs…One jackass ate Mentos (Maybe…I heard it works [:P]) and said “Robotics is simple. All we need is to search Google and copy the work of some foreign geeks !”. 3 pair of eyes shined, smiled at each other. Next they hit Google, surfed for porn, sorry Geeky Electronics stuff, arranged their wires and bulbs and ran their cart, stood first in the event. And here was the first success of 2010 batch CVRCE ROBOTICS TEAM !
One thing always scrambles my mind. What was there in that event? To run a cart and reach the finish line? I don’t understand why they are drawing such accolades [:X]. Even I saw such kind of carts driven by 2-3 year old naked kids on streets with great excitement [:P]. Added to that after their win they acted as if they are facing a press conference with a bunch of fucking idiots asking questions. Oops I forgot to mention. The three jackasses introduced one more jackass Rocket Sahani into their team. A team of 4. What was the team’s name? Hmmm…yeah MAVERICK. Sounds geeky right ? [:P]…honestly I feel MAVE-DICK would have been more apt. These are four excited jerks trying to give a name that will not be understandable to most and that will sound geeky enough.
Anyway I don’t understand why I don’t see the four together. The fourth jackass is not seen with the group anymore. Apparently he has been replaced by a semi guy Sita [:-D]. May be for success team MAVERICK thought to introduce a Cheer-Girl. Err…not sure yaar. After all behind every successful man there is a woman [:D]. So team MAVERICK returned home victorious with lump sum amount of cash [:P] and lot of attention in the college. All this lured other attention seekers to get into this geeky business. After than many more frustus and wannabe-geeks made robots and pole danced them in many functions and gained attention [:D].
Don’t think that I’m letting out my frustration on them. I’m frustrated on the system [:X]. But it’s not my habit to let out my frustration on losers. Here among these common sense starved people these bunch of jackass bounce and show their certified asses as their achievements, running a cart, lighting a bulb, switch on/off a fan. Is this what’s called robotics huh? I must say those losers to get a life. Even I feel like laughing when I see those robots giving seminars on ROBOTICS. And I feel weirder when I see the other guys staring curiously to their yawning classes with eyes wide open. Come on do something new. Even DOCOMO cries it out you old brained idiots [:X]. Never ever I heard of someone speaking of ROBOTICS outside the college campus in the paan stalls, coz no one wants his maa behen by initiating those topics…!
I’m fed up…gotcha debug.
Signing Off,
Hatasia Harry
(Senior Khabri)
PS: Coming soon… Sequel to this Article…”We, Robot”…Here’s a preview of what to expect in the concluding part of this segment…More geeks from ETC, More Geekism !

The Tribes of CVRCE

The SEXONS (sections) of CVRCE…
Hi all the dumbasses. This is my debut post and feel like peeing in front of The White House while writing this blog because both are a matter of great Pride ! So being the Senior Guptachar let me first give you an inside analysis of all the sexons sections of our batch. We will go alphabetically or else AEI people will again say that we have been neglected.

  • AEI (The Rumor-mongers or Pawanaas) - If you are a victim of useless rum ours in CVRCE then you must curse this tribe. They are lead by D.'I never fart’ Rao and Miss ‘Dance India Dance’ Ranjeeta. These people are one of the most civilized tribe of CVRCE ; After all they went for a strike because of No Lab ! Get a life man ! Who complains about it except these "We are so geek" people? This class has a considerable number of people who come to college in the morning and end up standing in the queue for movie tickets. They change their CR in every now and then; Much faster than the change of Pakistani captains !


  • Chemical (The Unknowns) - We don't know much about these people. How they look? Or where they stay? Etc.No one is interested in them as they don't have hot girls unlike other sections. The story of evolution of this tribe is when Raj Thackeray attacked north Indian students in Mumbai they flew to their land but in the midway appeared KRK and rescued them with his Deshdrohi act and sent them here to CVRCE. I think these Chemies have invented some invisible mask and they wear it every time. I just know one guy from Chemical named Kishaan (added an extra ‘K’ because of his involvement with "Gay", I mean "K" section people). But the tragedy is that he never admits that he belongs to chemical.


  • Computer Science-1 (The valley of Frustus) - When you see these people they look so frustrated because they did not score enough to get ETC and some of them are still in coma. They have some legendary Casanovas (duh!) like Altaf Raja Bankiya and 40 years old Virgin Sahoo. Then there is also a Band which is more interested in growing mafia size rather than making music or increasing their fan base. They have so much frustus in CS1 that even a guy gives treat after getting a testimonial from Brazil. Some run a group called GMS to increase there network business following. And a guy named Binay Kumar Jhadoo does piercing after getting dumped by a Mechi-Toki.


  • Computer Science-2 (The Angels & Demons) - This class is full of Angels ( I mean witches ) led by CS2 Sherni and the best part is that they have a plenty of them too. Even one is imported from China itself and one even is half-mental. The class is divided into two groups the ruling party called as 'We want a mass bunk' and there is the minority opposition party named 'We should have been informed about mass bunk earlier'. These people have not attended a single lab in 7th semester, The real demons for teachers. The strangest thing about this class is the rate in which people faint here lead by Bangali Behosh, the CR followed by Chutki Mahapatra, China Bomb and Tomboy Satpathy. I must tell you about the Don of CS, the ever charming and furious Maka who lights a cigarette from its filter.


  • Electrical (The Inglorious Infighters) - These people can easily give BJP a run for there money as far as infighting is concerned. And the worst thing is that they even have infighting for being the topper. WTF ?! This section consists of bunch of Bihari chachas and Odiya saahi lafangas. They are so charged of that even a mediocre goonda like Nanda Prusty is starting to rain blows on people thrice his size. Most of the people including chicks here are niggers and they can easily scare the hell out of Lara or Obama. They have the most famous the queen of english Miss ‘Shut Yr 'A' Up’ Tripathy and Mr. Dhoti Shaker Padhy, our very own dual meaning poet. I must not criticize much else Knee30 will send PCR to my home also !


To be continued...............
Ladkibaaz Larry
(Guptchar-in-Chief)

Monday, November 23, 2009

Semester Monster


There are good time. And there are bad times. But once in six months there comes a really really bad time which completely decimates the already muddled up minds of us Engineering students. Yeah you guessed it right. Its the ‘EggZam Time’ ! It comes once in every six months and spreads a wave of despair all around. Some symptoms to look around for when the semesters are round the corner…


  • The in-season starts for the Xerox/Photocopy Shops. Loads and loads of students make a beeline in these shops to take photocopies of various notes, leaked question papers, so called ‘Sure-Shot’ questions and what-nots. Photo copying becomes the Engineering hobby during the exam time !
  • Big crowds at old book stores/second hand book stores. They are preferred over the newer edition any day. Why? Coz the previous owner must have marked out and underlined the important points. But what the students are unaware that there are many devil minded guys like me who underline and mark out unnecessary points and portions of the book before selling it off with the sole reason to land the next owner in trouble ! Evil. Ain’t it?!
  • Frequent mobile recharges. Its strange that how the need to communicate increases exponentially during the time of exams. Also the level of friendship takes a huge leap in the Y-axis during the exam times !
  • Uncanny amount of status updates in Orkut, Facebook, Twitter, Etc.
  • Big Rush at various messes in the name of ‘Group Study’. Two things I have learnt in my Engineering career. One. Exam papers dont leak. Two. There is no such thing as ‘Group Study’ !
  • Mechanical, Electronics and Electrical students debating on whose subject s are the toughest. CS and IT students can’t even open their mouths in these debates ! AEI students watching Movie at S-Complex.
  • The Annual BPUT strike to reschedule the exam dates
  • The IPL season starts during the Exam Season. F**K You Lalit Modi.
  • And last but not the least. Hyper-Tension all around. You can Practically feel it in the air !

Kalakaar Kerry
(Associate Khabri)

Monday, November 2, 2009

Bunk-Masters III : The Monginis Monsters

Welocme to yet another segment of our special report on ‘Bunk-Masters of CVRCE’. Today we are going to discuss about the feared ‘Monginis Monsters’. The wild and dangerous creatures belong to the Mechanical Branch. Their natural habitat has been the Monginis Eatery for quite a long time. A bit of research reveals that they have been driven out of their original habitat (Mechanical Building) by educational predators (Teachers). These creatures are also known to have severe allergy to ‘Classrooms’.
Disclaimer: This post is a work of fiction. All the characters in this post, living or dead are fictious. Any resemblance to any real life character is purely co-incidental. But if somehow the people on whom this post is targeted on manage to figure out the sarcasm, they are requested to take this in a sporting spirit. A little fun doesn’t hurt anyone . Does it !?
The Members…
  • Small 92.7 FM
  • Oversized Bhaaloo/Kau
  • Confused Bong
  • PJ Man
  • DisCo Kid
  • Jha Dumper
  • Table Fan
After days of wandering in the barren wastelands (College Bus Stand), The Savanna Grasslands (Mechanical Lawns), they have finally settled down in the Polar Ice-caps (Monginis) permanently. they can be seen enjoying the cool AC, enjoying the aroma of stale food and sometimes gulping down bottles of soft drinks normally snatched away from weaker nearby creatures.
This group consists of people of all shapes and sizes. It baffles even highly qualified scientists about the mind-boggling diversity of the form factor of these creatures. They communicate with each other in irritatingly loud and incomprehensible voices. Small 92.7 FM is well known for her loud and tirelessly continuous orating skills despite being one of the smallest creatures in the college. Confused Bong is the bassist of the college band ‘Terrible-Noyze’. SO he is under the false impression that he can blast out high decibels of crap-talk from his unusually big mouth. Same is the case with Oversized Bhaaloo/Kau. Various wildlife observers are still in the loss of words whether to classify him into Bhaaloo, Kau or Homo-Sexual..Oops sorry.. Homo-Sapiens.
Other members of the group are Disco Kid, Jha-Dumper, PJ Man and Table Fan. Disco Kid is a celeb in CVRCE. This tall kid has various laurels in his kitty over the past year like punching the college registrar, attending the sacred ‘Disco’ (Disciplinary Committee), Bagging Jha-Dumper,etc. Experts recommends the general public to stay away from PJ-Man and Table Fan for their own safety. PJ Man hurls rotten PJs (Phaltu Jokes) at his unlucky victims. While Table Fan blows airs about himself all the time. Some of the common airs are “I have had 6 girlfriends at the same time”,”I coach the granddaughter of SRK”,”I played poker with Martians”,etc. And I’m not going to write anything about Jha-Dumper lest Disco Kid gives me one of his legendary punches. Phew. So goes the story about the ‘Mechanical Monginis Monsters’. Stay clear, Stay Safe. More to come next time.
Signing off…

Dahara Dick

(Senior Khabri)

Sunday, November 1, 2009

The Bunk-Masters of CVRCE !

Anyone read ‘Secret Seven’? ‘Famous Five’? ‘Fantastic Four’? No…? No one? Damn, I knew it! none of you ‘Geeks’ ever read anything other than academics. And non of you ‘Non-Geeks’ read anything at all! Well I’m dedicating this post to the people whom I’ll fondly (read ‘Devilishly’!) call as the ‘Bunk-masters’. Yeah that’s a pretty lame nomenclature. But did I wish their names to be cool or something! Ok..As I promised in one of my earlier posts that I wont be revealing the real names of my victims to protect their identities (duh!). But I will be using a series of more than obvious Code Names which even a kid can crack (Geez! Doesn't that smell of superhero kinda stuff?! Codenames and all !)


  • So,coming back to the topic. There are many ‘Bunk-Master’ Gangs in our college like the ‘Monginis Monsters’ from the Mechanical Branch who spend the maximum possible time enjoying the free A/C at the Monginis eatery!
  • Then there are the ‘Canteen Campers’ from the Computer Science Branch who are probably under the impression that the classes take place in the canteen. They get down from the bus, spend the whole day in the canteen, then go back home.
  • Hey ! How can I forget the ‘AEI AutoSquad’ ! Yeah. The strange people from AEI branch always come to the college in the Bus and leave within 15 minutes by Autorickshaws ! Probably off to catch some stupid flick at S-Complex or even going window shopping at Forum Mart if the tickets aren’t available. It beats me that why the hell do they bother coming 20 kilometers to college if they have to leave within 10-15 minutes anyway? Hats off to you Autosquad!
  • Same was the case with the ‘IT PhotoSquad’ a few months back. The only difference here is that these species can be seen sprawling all over the college lawns, trees, rocks, et al posing for group photographs. Till today these guys pollute Orkut and Facebook with numerous photo uploads. But strangely they are spotted toiling their asses off studying hard of late…It scares the shit outta me that they even did extra classes for the PPT!
  • Hmm…Well there’s nothing much to say about the guys from the Electrical Branch. Though they are far behind the bunking standards set by the ‘Mechanical Monginis Monsters’ and the ‘CS Canteen Campers’ they still are catching up with the ‘AEI AutoSquad’ and ‘IT PhotoSquad’ in terms of Paagalpan under the able leadership of Mr. Dhoti-Shaker Padhy !
  • There are a few more assorted groups like the ‘Canteen Commandoes’ which can give the ‘CS Canteen Campers’ a run for their money any day and the ‘Gay Section Guys…Oops sorry…’The K Section Guys’ who can be spotted either in the Bike Stand or the So called Fast Food shop at the back gate. I’m going to elaborated about these groups some day later.


You must have noticed that I have missed out the names of any of the ‘Bunk-Master Gangs’ from the ETC and the Chemical branches. Well. Are you kidding? Have you ever seen anyone from ETC bunking the classes ?(Well…apart from the couple of ETC outcasts from the ‘Canteen Commandoes Gang’). These guys would stand near the door and take notes even if they are driven out from their classes by their psychotic lecturers ! And have you seen anyone from the Chemical Branch at all ?! Honestly guys it took me one year to notice that our college has a branch called chemical engineering. Well…That says the story!

Well I’m signing off with a toast to these ‘Bunk-Masters’ gangs who keep the noble art of bunking alive in our college. Cheerz!

Signing off…

Dahara Dick

(Senior Khabri)